patricia d
Essential Question How did the aftermath of World War II effect the family roles in a 1950's household and in society?
I'm writing a research paper on this topic, I have a lot of idea but i was wondering if anyone could give me link to first hand accounts or just general information about life in the 1950's
direct answers to the question would be great to!!
focusing mostly on American middle class( focusing on other classes would be great to.. but i have a maximum of 7 pages..)
Answer
Summary of Culture and Life in the 1950's...............................
The 1950's represent a variety of things to many different people. It was a time of
growth, capitalism, conservatism, and anticommunism. With the baby boom in full swing,
suburbs were appearing near large cities. Highways were being constructed to connect suburbs
to each other across the nation. They also connected the nuclear family to vacation spots and to
the rest of their extended family. Capitalism grew as world powers including the United States
and the United Kingdom tried to defeat communism. Anticommunism lead to the conflict in
Korea as well as McCarthyism, which cost many people their jobs. The cold war, fueled by
communism, had new fronts to be fought and weapons to potentially be used. The first
American satellite to orbit the earth, named Explorer 1, came near the end of the decade.
Eisenhower, elected president in 1953 and 1957, helped promote the field of nuclear technology,
leading to American school children being taught to hide under desks in case of an attack and
adults building shelters in their backyards.1
Life was not all about fear however. Restrictions on products available were lifted,
some more quickly than others, depending on the country's recovery rate from World War II.2
This was also the time of Elvis and rock'n'roll, James Dean and Marlon Brando, and sex symbols
Marilyn Monroe and Brigitte Bardot. Elizabeth II was coronated Queen of England in 1953,
nearly 400 years after the first Queen Elizabeth. The first jet liner carrying passengers took
flight in 1958.3 Alaska and Hawaii became states in 1959, and public schools across the nation
became desegregated. And who could resist flying saucer watching? Teens became their own
subgroup, and with a pre-cursor to MTV, American Bandstand became a popular TV show.
Kitchen appliances were appearing in pastel colors, and aerial TVs were in just about every
home4.
Along with the changes in the rest of life in the 1950's, fashion was undergoing many
of its own changes, and was greatly influenced by things like music and movie idols. Having
style quite often meant taking luxury to extremes.5 Couture of the early fifties included a
batwinged peplum with an easily detachable trained overskirt, a cocktail dress with a corolla
bosom, the color shocking pink, and designs by the American Charles James.6 Designs by Dior
included âen vol,â a double apron day dress, hugely bloused tops in the style of an artist's smock,
very tight skirts, and Peter Pan collars. Balenciaga and Balmain were other Parisian couture
designers. These designersâ styles were modified for the average woman. Other styles included
pinafore dresses with polo neck jumpers or for secretaries, crisp, white blouses, and somewhat
sensible shoes. A black leotard with a long circular skirt and stole, and corduroy smock and
knickerbockers suit were also popular styles. People in the art community preferred baggy
clothes, such as raincoats and over-sized sweaters, and suits, pressed or wrinkled. Men's evening
clothes did not experience many changes. Men's outerwear did experience a few changes; theâbikerâ look came into style, as well as double breasted suits with theatrical cloaks, and a tighter
version of the Edwardian frock coat.
Hairstyles in this time were also changing. Chemical hair treatments were available for
use at home, but they were not entirely safe and so many women went to professional
hairstylists.7 Women had to get their hair cut and permed at six to seven week intervals, with
washing and setting once every week to week and a half by the hairdresser. Girls wore rollers
and hairnets to bed at night. They also pulled their hair back with a band of velvet during the
daytime. Men wore their hair short, as long hair was âunmanly.â
The late fifties was the time of teenagers. They now had jobs and therefore money to
spend, giving them more power to dictate popular styles8. Girls wore buttoned cardigans and
simples skirts or pinafore dresses with stockings and stilettos. Some girls wore tight trousers and
ballet shoes, since high heels were not considered appropriate with that style. Summer clothes
included cotton skirts with layered petticoats. Leisure clothes were typically jeans know as
âdungareesâ or pedal pusher capris, also known as pirate pants, with a shirt of some kind,
sometimes a man's shirt.9 For formal events, girls dressed like adults. For informal events, they
quite often wore what became known as poodle skirts, consisting of wool felt with large hems
and appliqués, with a high waisted belt, a tight fitting blouse tucked in, and high heels. Boys had
choices including Italian jackets, fluorescent socks, leather jackets, jeans, shaggy sweaters, and
sandals.10 If a young man wanted to deviate from the norm, darker colors, rougher textures, and
crumpled clothes would get peoples' attention.11 One example of this was the Teddy Boys; they
were seen as anti-social for being non-conformist.
Fashion was suddenly going backwards, no longer starting in Paris. Another change
was mass production.12 During the Second World War, clothes manufactures had found ways to
produce more clothes faster and cheaper, and this continued after the war, allowing mass
production for the general public to replace custom made clothing. This caused Parisian fashion
houses to start working with mass retailers and at the same time started the idea of âplanned
obsolescence,â meaning twice a year, the previous season's styles were to be replaced with the
new season's styles. In order to protect their styles at fashion shows, everything from cameras to
sketchbooks were banned. Fabric and fiber availability increased as well; synthetics greatly
expanded choices, and this allowed advances in leisure wear, underwear, and sportswear, among
others. Men's dress changed in that vests, hats, and suspenders decreased in popularity, while
belts, zippers, and cardigans gained popularity. Men working in an office typically wore a suit,
known widely as âthe gray flannel suit,â although it was not always gray flannel; in 1950 Pierre
Cardin designed a suit of stripped cotton. Leisure clothes were changing from military looking
to colorful, comfortable sweaters, poplin shirts, and slip-on shoes. Popular women's styles were
still influenced by Dior, Jaques Griffe, and Marion.13 They included day suits, trapeze dresses, a
return to the twenties' hobbled day dresses, and day dresses with stiff white collars, wide belts,box pleats at the waist, and skirts with a bounce. Coco Channel was another designer, however
she designed clothes for women in the real world with ease, comfort and practicality.14 Her look
included straight skirts, sometimes with box pleats, a single breasted cardigan, sometimes with
lapels, braid and ribbon trims in contrasting colors, and blouses with pussycat bows. Her
thoughts were âFashion fades; only style remains the same.â With the baby boom came the
appearance of maternity clothes.15 It was now a possibility to be pregnant and be in style. The
ideal image of a woman at this time was a housewife, although many photographs indicate the
woman should look like a doll, complete with a heart shaped apron, and was always covered in
frills.16 If the woman had to work outside the home, she wore trim closely fitted close similar to
an airline stewardess, in high heels, emphasizing fragility and curves. Social entertainment dress
was âswan-neckedâ and âsoft shoulderedâ with a ârustling taffeta skirt, shimmering silks,â or
âpastel nylon net decorated with lace, ribbons and sequins.â Parts of dress not thought of often
include corsets, brassieres, nylon hose, and make-up. Corsets still held their place in a woman's
wardrobe, as the ideal body figure was the figure eight hourglass shape, to attract a man for
marriage. Strapless brassieres were becoming more important, since dresses were being
designed without straps as well. Nylon hose improved in fineness, cost, and shape. This may
have led to skirt length shortening, from lower calf to above the knee. Movie make-up artists
took advantage of the release of restrictions to encourage women to wear a light coating of rouge
and eye shadow, liquid eyeliner, and large amounts of mascara, but lipstick was the most
important part.
Summary of Interview with Dianna Dutka
According to Dianna, the styles that were most popular for females were knee length felt skirts,
cashmere cardigans, bobby socks with black and white saddle shoes or high heels, dresses with
pinched waists, and the back collars on all blouses turned up. Men wore gray flannel suits. The
style she and her friends followed was Channel and Bill Blass, and very conservative. The
âcoolâ clothes of the time were skirts, sweaters, and circle felt skirts. Dianna stated that most
girls were influenced by Marilyn Monroe and the guys by James Dean. A popular hairstyle for
guys was called the âduck ass haircut.â She didn't have restrictions regarding what she wore
outside of her catholic school. Movie idols included Frank Sinatra, the Rat Pack, Marilyn
Monroe, and Bobby Darin. Music idols included the Beatles, Les Paul, Mary Flord, Henry
Mancini, Nat King Cole, Perry Como, Diah Shore, Ester Williams, Tony Curtis, Jerry Lewis, and
Dean Martin. Johnnie Ray was popular for make out songs, and Bill Halley and the Comets
were famous for the song âRock Around The Clock.â Technological advances included black
and white TVs without remotes, phones with dials, microwaves, automatic transmission cars,
automatic windows, and âHollywood Muffler Pipes.â Popular TV shows included Ed Sullivan
who had the Beatles and Milton Berle among others on his show, Gunsmoke, Rawhide, and Hit
Parade. Radio shows were mainl
Summary of Culture and Life in the 1950's...............................
The 1950's represent a variety of things to many different people. It was a time of
growth, capitalism, conservatism, and anticommunism. With the baby boom in full swing,
suburbs were appearing near large cities. Highways were being constructed to connect suburbs
to each other across the nation. They also connected the nuclear family to vacation spots and to
the rest of their extended family. Capitalism grew as world powers including the United States
and the United Kingdom tried to defeat communism. Anticommunism lead to the conflict in
Korea as well as McCarthyism, which cost many people their jobs. The cold war, fueled by
communism, had new fronts to be fought and weapons to potentially be used. The first
American satellite to orbit the earth, named Explorer 1, came near the end of the decade.
Eisenhower, elected president in 1953 and 1957, helped promote the field of nuclear technology,
leading to American school children being taught to hide under desks in case of an attack and
adults building shelters in their backyards.1
Life was not all about fear however. Restrictions on products available were lifted,
some more quickly than others, depending on the country's recovery rate from World War II.2
This was also the time of Elvis and rock'n'roll, James Dean and Marlon Brando, and sex symbols
Marilyn Monroe and Brigitte Bardot. Elizabeth II was coronated Queen of England in 1953,
nearly 400 years after the first Queen Elizabeth. The first jet liner carrying passengers took
flight in 1958.3 Alaska and Hawaii became states in 1959, and public schools across the nation
became desegregated. And who could resist flying saucer watching? Teens became their own
subgroup, and with a pre-cursor to MTV, American Bandstand became a popular TV show.
Kitchen appliances were appearing in pastel colors, and aerial TVs were in just about every
home4.
Along with the changes in the rest of life in the 1950's, fashion was undergoing many
of its own changes, and was greatly influenced by things like music and movie idols. Having
style quite often meant taking luxury to extremes.5 Couture of the early fifties included a
batwinged peplum with an easily detachable trained overskirt, a cocktail dress with a corolla
bosom, the color shocking pink, and designs by the American Charles James.6 Designs by Dior
included âen vol,â a double apron day dress, hugely bloused tops in the style of an artist's smock,
very tight skirts, and Peter Pan collars. Balenciaga and Balmain were other Parisian couture
designers. These designersâ styles were modified for the average woman. Other styles included
pinafore dresses with polo neck jumpers or for secretaries, crisp, white blouses, and somewhat
sensible shoes. A black leotard with a long circular skirt and stole, and corduroy smock and
knickerbockers suit were also popular styles. People in the art community preferred baggy
clothes, such as raincoats and over-sized sweaters, and suits, pressed or wrinkled. Men's evening
clothes did not experience many changes. Men's outerwear did experience a few changes; theâbikerâ look came into style, as well as double breasted suits with theatrical cloaks, and a tighter
version of the Edwardian frock coat.
Hairstyles in this time were also changing. Chemical hair treatments were available for
use at home, but they were not entirely safe and so many women went to professional
hairstylists.7 Women had to get their hair cut and permed at six to seven week intervals, with
washing and setting once every week to week and a half by the hairdresser. Girls wore rollers
and hairnets to bed at night. They also pulled their hair back with a band of velvet during the
daytime. Men wore their hair short, as long hair was âunmanly.â
The late fifties was the time of teenagers. They now had jobs and therefore money to
spend, giving them more power to dictate popular styles8. Girls wore buttoned cardigans and
simples skirts or pinafore dresses with stockings and stilettos. Some girls wore tight trousers and
ballet shoes, since high heels were not considered appropriate with that style. Summer clothes
included cotton skirts with layered petticoats. Leisure clothes were typically jeans know as
âdungareesâ or pedal pusher capris, also known as pirate pants, with a shirt of some kind,
sometimes a man's shirt.9 For formal events, girls dressed like adults. For informal events, they
quite often wore what became known as poodle skirts, consisting of wool felt with large hems
and appliqués, with a high waisted belt, a tight fitting blouse tucked in, and high heels. Boys had
choices including Italian jackets, fluorescent socks, leather jackets, jeans, shaggy sweaters, and
sandals.10 If a young man wanted to deviate from the norm, darker colors, rougher textures, and
crumpled clothes would get peoples' attention.11 One example of this was the Teddy Boys; they
were seen as anti-social for being non-conformist.
Fashion was suddenly going backwards, no longer starting in Paris. Another change
was mass production.12 During the Second World War, clothes manufactures had found ways to
produce more clothes faster and cheaper, and this continued after the war, allowing mass
production for the general public to replace custom made clothing. This caused Parisian fashion
houses to start working with mass retailers and at the same time started the idea of âplanned
obsolescence,â meaning twice a year, the previous season's styles were to be replaced with the
new season's styles. In order to protect their styles at fashion shows, everything from cameras to
sketchbooks were banned. Fabric and fiber availability increased as well; synthetics greatly
expanded choices, and this allowed advances in leisure wear, underwear, and sportswear, among
others. Men's dress changed in that vests, hats, and suspenders decreased in popularity, while
belts, zippers, and cardigans gained popularity. Men working in an office typically wore a suit,
known widely as âthe gray flannel suit,â although it was not always gray flannel; in 1950 Pierre
Cardin designed a suit of stripped cotton. Leisure clothes were changing from military looking
to colorful, comfortable sweaters, poplin shirts, and slip-on shoes. Popular women's styles were
still influenced by Dior, Jaques Griffe, and Marion.13 They included day suits, trapeze dresses, a
return to the twenties' hobbled day dresses, and day dresses with stiff white collars, wide belts,box pleats at the waist, and skirts with a bounce. Coco Channel was another designer, however
she designed clothes for women in the real world with ease, comfort and practicality.14 Her look
included straight skirts, sometimes with box pleats, a single breasted cardigan, sometimes with
lapels, braid and ribbon trims in contrasting colors, and blouses with pussycat bows. Her
thoughts were âFashion fades; only style remains the same.â With the baby boom came the
appearance of maternity clothes.15 It was now a possibility to be pregnant and be in style. The
ideal image of a woman at this time was a housewife, although many photographs indicate the
woman should look like a doll, complete with a heart shaped apron, and was always covered in
frills.16 If the woman had to work outside the home, she wore trim closely fitted close similar to
an airline stewardess, in high heels, emphasizing fragility and curves. Social entertainment dress
was âswan-neckedâ and âsoft shoulderedâ with a ârustling taffeta skirt, shimmering silks,â or
âpastel nylon net decorated with lace, ribbons and sequins.â Parts of dress not thought of often
include corsets, brassieres, nylon hose, and make-up. Corsets still held their place in a woman's
wardrobe, as the ideal body figure was the figure eight hourglass shape, to attract a man for
marriage. Strapless brassieres were becoming more important, since dresses were being
designed without straps as well. Nylon hose improved in fineness, cost, and shape. This may
have led to skirt length shortening, from lower calf to above the knee. Movie make-up artists
took advantage of the release of restrictions to encourage women to wear a light coating of rouge
and eye shadow, liquid eyeliner, and large amounts of mascara, but lipstick was the most
important part.
Summary of Interview with Dianna Dutka
According to Dianna, the styles that were most popular for females were knee length felt skirts,
cashmere cardigans, bobby socks with black and white saddle shoes or high heels, dresses with
pinched waists, and the back collars on all blouses turned up. Men wore gray flannel suits. The
style she and her friends followed was Channel and Bill Blass, and very conservative. The
âcoolâ clothes of the time were skirts, sweaters, and circle felt skirts. Dianna stated that most
girls were influenced by Marilyn Monroe and the guys by James Dean. A popular hairstyle for
guys was called the âduck ass haircut.â She didn't have restrictions regarding what she wore
outside of her catholic school. Movie idols included Frank Sinatra, the Rat Pack, Marilyn
Monroe, and Bobby Darin. Music idols included the Beatles, Les Paul, Mary Flord, Henry
Mancini, Nat King Cole, Perry Como, Diah Shore, Ester Williams, Tony Curtis, Jerry Lewis, and
Dean Martin. Johnnie Ray was popular for make out songs, and Bill Halley and the Comets
were famous for the song âRock Around The Clock.â Technological advances included black
and white TVs without remotes, phones with dials, microwaves, automatic transmission cars,
automatic windows, and âHollywood Muffler Pipes.â Popular TV shows included Ed Sullivan
who had the Beatles and Milton Berle among others on his show, Gunsmoke, Rawhide, and Hit
Parade. Radio shows were mainl
Do you judge people on the clothes they wear?
maddy005
Are you turned on by people who claim to have a superior dressing sense?
Why do people disparage others because of their clothes?
Answer
Hi Maddy, for me it is not so much about being "turned on" by those who dress well, but more about being "turned off" by those who don't. I fully understand many people are very poor, and I have been that poor myself, so folks who lack funds are not going to be able to dress as well as they might like. It is not folks who have difficulty purchasing decent clothing, but rather those who do, but choose not to.
It is human nature to judge others, and while I do try hard to see a person for who they are and not for the package they are in, it sometimes is difficult when a person who chooses to seperate him or herself from the crowd by dressing in negitive manners. Many of us here in the United States like to lay claim to not having "classes". However, this is simply not true. In other answers to question(s) you put forth, we spoke a bit about this. About how we have failed to achieve a "classless" society. We can all tell if somebody is of "our class" by how an individual dresses and comports oneself. If I walked into a fine resteraunt in my jeans and a nice blouse and sandles, (my usual dress of choice) I would be frowned upon by the patrons and probably expelled from the establishment. The excuse would be I did not meet the dress requirements, but the real reason would be they clearly see I am not of that class who frequents that particular establishment. Once, my deceased husband took me to a very nice resteraunt, one which catered to more affluant folks. I did not object as he was proud to take me to this nice place, it was a treat he had planned for a while. However, I was very conscience of the disaproving looks and the snooty attitude of our waiter. We stayed and had a nice meal, but it was difficult to actually enjoy it. My dear husband was oblivious to the under currents and I kept him there as it would only have hurt him to think I felf undeserving of eating at a particular place. Men seem a bit less sensitive to such social barriers, but women are right on top of them. Why this is true simply goes to the way we are raised, to recognize the needs of those around us and to try to meet them.
I do have to say I don't actually care for the "upper" levels of society here in this country or any Western culture. If we were to become wealthy I and my husband would not feel "part" of those who have "old" money. We also would not feel "part" of others who had "new" money and enjoy flashing it around by making large purchases and wearing expensive jewlery, etc. Those who are new to wealth tend to flash, while those who were born wealthy live rather understated, but in luxury. I watch some of those "fashion" shows and am appalled at some of the clothing offered for thousands of dollars. I wouldn't be caught dead in many of those outfits! I remember an episode of "I Love Lucy", where they were in Paris and Lucy and her friend despertly wanted a "designer" dress. Well, Ricky and Fred went out and got some flour sacks, a couple of buckets for hats, and made "designer" dresses for the "girls". Of course this was to teach them a lesson of falling into the fashion debacles. When the "girls" opened boxes seemingly from a famous designer, they were wowed, and put on these rediculous made up atrocious dresses and went out like they were some snooty snobby rich women in designer clothing. Of course they were laughed at and humiliated, and everyone watching the show thought it funny.
I however thought it horrid husbands would treat wifes like children. While the I Love Lucy show is from a different time, (thank God!) it still goes to the heart of class and wealth and how people judge by looks, clothing and attitudes. Living in the most highest class of this country means disembling and lying about how one feels about others. People are sweet and accepting to your face, but while smiling they tear you apart with barbs and quips meant to hurt and maim. I simply am unable to tolerate such behavior and so I would stand out as an outsider in such a crowd. I would also be a priime victem of such behaviors as with me what you see is what you get, there is not an ounce of subterfuge or dishonesty about me. I am judged because I am unable to lie or be dishonest. People just don't know how to take me and so are suspicious of me. They simply have trouble believing I don't have any hidden motives or agendas with them. I understand, but it is difficult to find good friends who are able to give back at the level I give. My children are in the same predictiment as they were raised to be kind and honest, not decietful or mean spirited, or selfish.
I sure do get off track don't I? lol Anyway, sure we all judge others by how they dress. It can go both ways though, judged for dressing too poorly for the class you are in, or for dressing to flashy for the class your weath puts you in. If a person wishes to really "belong" he or she has to make a decison to comform. Only the richest folks are able to be truely different and get away with it. Instead of being weird or lacking in some manner they are labled, "quirky", or "eccentric", and everybody chuckles with fond amusement, rather than in any negitive manner. However, if you or I do the same, we are judged negitively, right or wrong it is a fact of life.
I choose to not comform, and as such I pay a price. It was once an unconscience choice, one I just felt right, and the price then was hurt feelings and feeling of not belonging. However, as I grew older I began to understand exactly what I would be giving up if I choose to comfrom. Happiness can be very allusive for those who choose to comform. Comforming may bring materialistic items by gaining social acceptance and increasing ones power by climbing the corperate and social ladders, but it stiffles who the person really is. When we are stiffled how can we truly be happy?
The children who take the road their folks laid out for them may do well in life finacially but often will be unhappy as it is not the road they may have chosen for themselves. Clothing is a part of that as well as how one conducts oneself. We are groomed from childhood and that demarks who we are for the rest of our lives unless we make a conscience decison to buck the rules and expectations of those around us. By doing this we will pay a price, but for me it is a price I am willing to pay. Happiness if far more important to me than wealth or dressing in the newest designer clothing, or having the latest electronic gadgets, or driving a brand new Lexus every two years, or having a house I need a maid or two to care for, etc. There are websites all over which depict wealthy but unhappy spouses who are searching for extramarital affairs. The Eagles song, "Lying Eyes", about the young woman who married for wealth and went out to the poorer section of town for love really outlines this situation.
Anyway, sure people judge others by how they dress and yes some are turned on by those in flashy clothing, and fancy cars. However, it represents a lie: there may be comforts and security in weatlh, but it doesn't mean there will be happiness. However, we will continue to judge others by their appearance, regardless of how much we know this is wrong and unfair. We mean well, we really do, however, those first ten seconds of meeting somebody is the lasting impression we take with us. If we don't put forward our best in those first ten seconds we will be relegated to a lower class. How we dress and grooom ourselves is vital when we wish to make a good impression. For example: If a boy were to come to pick your daughter up for a date and he had on black leather and boots and drove up on a Harly, would you really want your child leaving with him? He could be the nicest person around and be wonderful to her, but the first impression is one of danger and one who bucks society. Then again, if he showed up dressed in nice slacks, in his fathers lexus, or BMW, brought flowers, and spoke well, was polite, came to the door, the likelihood of a father feeling relief is huge. The young man could have simply changed prior to coming to pick his girl up, and still be exactly the same guy on the bike a few hours ago. We can shed and put on new skin at any moment, purposely disguising who we really are. We use clothing, attitudes, etc, as masks, and most people wear masks.
Even knowing this truth, we still fall into that first ten second judgement of any person we first meet. First impressions last a very long time and are difficult to shed once it is established. If that same young man who was dressed well, spoke well, polite, later drove up on that bike in leather and boots, that first impression would be juxaposed on top and still viable. He could then get away with being who he really is as long as he pulls out his first impression getup every so often. There are many who have perfected the art of first impressions while hiding who they truely are. These folks have agendas we may not like the affects of and many are grifters. There are those who have refined the art so well they can merge with one crowd after another and nobody would know the difference. Look at undercover cops who get down into the underbelly of society, then come home to the wife and children. They are affective at what they do, and it is needed, but it shows how we need to really take care in how we allow that moment of first impression to affect our judgement.
Well, again, a question which is seemingly simple, but is quiet complex. You are very good at these types of question, Maddy! lol I tend to think a lot, and as such can over do a subject. I often found it difficult in school to keep my term papers on topic, as one easily leads to a connecting topic, which leads to a next, then to another and so on and so forth. Each componant is related, but can take me on a journey far supassing the original subject. lol
Like anybody else, I have a "normal" dress style, but still enjoy "dressing up". I have several very nice dresses and all the related items, and enjoy the looks I get when I wear one of these outfits. However, I still am a jeans and blouse Lady, who is from the country, and this is what is presented in daily life. I also enjoy wearing nice feminine suites, but am not particulary comfortable in them. I am most comfortable and feel more myself in my jeans, nice blouse, and sneakers, or cute sandels. If somebody wishes to judge me so be it. lol I am old enough to not really care that much for what others think, and that is very freeing. Oh, I still care about my loved ones opinions and I hate being looked down upon, but the freedom of just being me is well worth it, don't you agree? My husband seems to think I am something special and I think he has on rose colored glasses. Then again, I think he is somebody special and he thinks I have on rose colored glasses. My point is I find people the most attractive who are decent human beings with honor, integrity, ethics, kindness, etc, but don't know just how great they are. Once somebody "knows" they are great, then they get a big head and simply lose that element of uniqueness. Once somebody starts believing they are truly something special, well they lose that special quality. It is in the lack of knowlege that I find so sweet and compelling. A person can have a high level of self esteem and confidence and yet not have a "big head" and that is the most attractive quality for me. It is the person who has a solid foundation of who they are, what they believe in while keeping an open mind, which is attractive. We can have a strong belief sysem and yet know our way is not the only way. Take off the outer layers and what is left? When we grow old, and our looks are fading, what is left? It is that what is left I find attractive, if indeed anything is left after the outer layers are removed. Worse: If ugliness is what is left. I have seen many beautiful people who are hollow at best, and ugly and mean at worst.
Well, I believe we are all guilty of judging others by what they wear and how they conduct themselves. I think many try not to engage in such low behavior, but it is human nature and difficult to control. We may refrain from speaking of it when we do it, but we still leave with that first impression and it stays with us. It is not just clothes either, but the color of ones skin, the car they drive, the color they choose to pain their homes, or rooms, how they decorate, what they eat, what they buy. I know folks who say they can tell by what is in a grocery cart what a person is like, or what is in their bathroom cupboards. Yep, some folks actually make an excuse to use your bathroom just so they can snoop and make judgements about who you are! So, yeah, this is a huge topic, one we could discuss for hours and still not exhaust. But I had better but my own chatter to an end. lol
I wish you a grand day and a wonderful upcoming weekend.
Hi Maddy, for me it is not so much about being "turned on" by those who dress well, but more about being "turned off" by those who don't. I fully understand many people are very poor, and I have been that poor myself, so folks who lack funds are not going to be able to dress as well as they might like. It is not folks who have difficulty purchasing decent clothing, but rather those who do, but choose not to.
It is human nature to judge others, and while I do try hard to see a person for who they are and not for the package they are in, it sometimes is difficult when a person who chooses to seperate him or herself from the crowd by dressing in negitive manners. Many of us here in the United States like to lay claim to not having "classes". However, this is simply not true. In other answers to question(s) you put forth, we spoke a bit about this. About how we have failed to achieve a "classless" society. We can all tell if somebody is of "our class" by how an individual dresses and comports oneself. If I walked into a fine resteraunt in my jeans and a nice blouse and sandles, (my usual dress of choice) I would be frowned upon by the patrons and probably expelled from the establishment. The excuse would be I did not meet the dress requirements, but the real reason would be they clearly see I am not of that class who frequents that particular establishment. Once, my deceased husband took me to a very nice resteraunt, one which catered to more affluant folks. I did not object as he was proud to take me to this nice place, it was a treat he had planned for a while. However, I was very conscience of the disaproving looks and the snooty attitude of our waiter. We stayed and had a nice meal, but it was difficult to actually enjoy it. My dear husband was oblivious to the under currents and I kept him there as it would only have hurt him to think I felf undeserving of eating at a particular place. Men seem a bit less sensitive to such social barriers, but women are right on top of them. Why this is true simply goes to the way we are raised, to recognize the needs of those around us and to try to meet them.
I do have to say I don't actually care for the "upper" levels of society here in this country or any Western culture. If we were to become wealthy I and my husband would not feel "part" of those who have "old" money. We also would not feel "part" of others who had "new" money and enjoy flashing it around by making large purchases and wearing expensive jewlery, etc. Those who are new to wealth tend to flash, while those who were born wealthy live rather understated, but in luxury. I watch some of those "fashion" shows and am appalled at some of the clothing offered for thousands of dollars. I wouldn't be caught dead in many of those outfits! I remember an episode of "I Love Lucy", where they were in Paris and Lucy and her friend despertly wanted a "designer" dress. Well, Ricky and Fred went out and got some flour sacks, a couple of buckets for hats, and made "designer" dresses for the "girls". Of course this was to teach them a lesson of falling into the fashion debacles. When the "girls" opened boxes seemingly from a famous designer, they were wowed, and put on these rediculous made up atrocious dresses and went out like they were some snooty snobby rich women in designer clothing. Of course they were laughed at and humiliated, and everyone watching the show thought it funny.
I however thought it horrid husbands would treat wifes like children. While the I Love Lucy show is from a different time, (thank God!) it still goes to the heart of class and wealth and how people judge by looks, clothing and attitudes. Living in the most highest class of this country means disembling and lying about how one feels about others. People are sweet and accepting to your face, but while smiling they tear you apart with barbs and quips meant to hurt and maim. I simply am unable to tolerate such behavior and so I would stand out as an outsider in such a crowd. I would also be a priime victem of such behaviors as with me what you see is what you get, there is not an ounce of subterfuge or dishonesty about me. I am judged because I am unable to lie or be dishonest. People just don't know how to take me and so are suspicious of me. They simply have trouble believing I don't have any hidden motives or agendas with them. I understand, but it is difficult to find good friends who are able to give back at the level I give. My children are in the same predictiment as they were raised to be kind and honest, not decietful or mean spirited, or selfish.
I sure do get off track don't I? lol Anyway, sure we all judge others by how they dress. It can go both ways though, judged for dressing too poorly for the class you are in, or for dressing to flashy for the class your weath puts you in. If a person wishes to really "belong" he or she has to make a decison to comform. Only the richest folks are able to be truely different and get away with it. Instead of being weird or lacking in some manner they are labled, "quirky", or "eccentric", and everybody chuckles with fond amusement, rather than in any negitive manner. However, if you or I do the same, we are judged negitively, right or wrong it is a fact of life.
I choose to not comform, and as such I pay a price. It was once an unconscience choice, one I just felt right, and the price then was hurt feelings and feeling of not belonging. However, as I grew older I began to understand exactly what I would be giving up if I choose to comfrom. Happiness can be very allusive for those who choose to comform. Comforming may bring materialistic items by gaining social acceptance and increasing ones power by climbing the corperate and social ladders, but it stiffles who the person really is. When we are stiffled how can we truly be happy?
The children who take the road their folks laid out for them may do well in life finacially but often will be unhappy as it is not the road they may have chosen for themselves. Clothing is a part of that as well as how one conducts oneself. We are groomed from childhood and that demarks who we are for the rest of our lives unless we make a conscience decison to buck the rules and expectations of those around us. By doing this we will pay a price, but for me it is a price I am willing to pay. Happiness if far more important to me than wealth or dressing in the newest designer clothing, or having the latest electronic gadgets, or driving a brand new Lexus every two years, or having a house I need a maid or two to care for, etc. There are websites all over which depict wealthy but unhappy spouses who are searching for extramarital affairs. The Eagles song, "Lying Eyes", about the young woman who married for wealth and went out to the poorer section of town for love really outlines this situation.
Anyway, sure people judge others by how they dress and yes some are turned on by those in flashy clothing, and fancy cars. However, it represents a lie: there may be comforts and security in weatlh, but it doesn't mean there will be happiness. However, we will continue to judge others by their appearance, regardless of how much we know this is wrong and unfair. We mean well, we really do, however, those first ten seconds of meeting somebody is the lasting impression we take with us. If we don't put forward our best in those first ten seconds we will be relegated to a lower class. How we dress and grooom ourselves is vital when we wish to make a good impression. For example: If a boy were to come to pick your daughter up for a date and he had on black leather and boots and drove up on a Harly, would you really want your child leaving with him? He could be the nicest person around and be wonderful to her, but the first impression is one of danger and one who bucks society. Then again, if he showed up dressed in nice slacks, in his fathers lexus, or BMW, brought flowers, and spoke well, was polite, came to the door, the likelihood of a father feeling relief is huge. The young man could have simply changed prior to coming to pick his girl up, and still be exactly the same guy on the bike a few hours ago. We can shed and put on new skin at any moment, purposely disguising who we really are. We use clothing, attitudes, etc, as masks, and most people wear masks.
Even knowing this truth, we still fall into that first ten second judgement of any person we first meet. First impressions last a very long time and are difficult to shed once it is established. If that same young man who was dressed well, spoke well, polite, later drove up on that bike in leather and boots, that first impression would be juxaposed on top and still viable. He could then get away with being who he really is as long as he pulls out his first impression getup every so often. There are many who have perfected the art of first impressions while hiding who they truely are. These folks have agendas we may not like the affects of and many are grifters. There are those who have refined the art so well they can merge with one crowd after another and nobody would know the difference. Look at undercover cops who get down into the underbelly of society, then come home to the wife and children. They are affective at what they do, and it is needed, but it shows how we need to really take care in how we allow that moment of first impression to affect our judgement.
Well, again, a question which is seemingly simple, but is quiet complex. You are very good at these types of question, Maddy! lol I tend to think a lot, and as such can over do a subject. I often found it difficult in school to keep my term papers on topic, as one easily leads to a connecting topic, which leads to a next, then to another and so on and so forth. Each componant is related, but can take me on a journey far supassing the original subject. lol
Like anybody else, I have a "normal" dress style, but still enjoy "dressing up". I have several very nice dresses and all the related items, and enjoy the looks I get when I wear one of these outfits. However, I still am a jeans and blouse Lady, who is from the country, and this is what is presented in daily life. I also enjoy wearing nice feminine suites, but am not particulary comfortable in them. I am most comfortable and feel more myself in my jeans, nice blouse, and sneakers, or cute sandels. If somebody wishes to judge me so be it. lol I am old enough to not really care that much for what others think, and that is very freeing. Oh, I still care about my loved ones opinions and I hate being looked down upon, but the freedom of just being me is well worth it, don't you agree? My husband seems to think I am something special and I think he has on rose colored glasses. Then again, I think he is somebody special and he thinks I have on rose colored glasses. My point is I find people the most attractive who are decent human beings with honor, integrity, ethics, kindness, etc, but don't know just how great they are. Once somebody "knows" they are great, then they get a big head and simply lose that element of uniqueness. Once somebody starts believing they are truly something special, well they lose that special quality. It is in the lack of knowlege that I find so sweet and compelling. A person can have a high level of self esteem and confidence and yet not have a "big head" and that is the most attractive quality for me. It is the person who has a solid foundation of who they are, what they believe in while keeping an open mind, which is attractive. We can have a strong belief sysem and yet know our way is not the only way. Take off the outer layers and what is left? When we grow old, and our looks are fading, what is left? It is that what is left I find attractive, if indeed anything is left after the outer layers are removed. Worse: If ugliness is what is left. I have seen many beautiful people who are hollow at best, and ugly and mean at worst.
Well, I believe we are all guilty of judging others by what they wear and how they conduct themselves. I think many try not to engage in such low behavior, but it is human nature and difficult to control. We may refrain from speaking of it when we do it, but we still leave with that first impression and it stays with us. It is not just clothes either, but the color of ones skin, the car they drive, the color they choose to pain their homes, or rooms, how they decorate, what they eat, what they buy. I know folks who say they can tell by what is in a grocery cart what a person is like, or what is in their bathroom cupboards. Yep, some folks actually make an excuse to use your bathroom just so they can snoop and make judgements about who you are! So, yeah, this is a huge topic, one we could discuss for hours and still not exhaust. But I had better but my own chatter to an end. lol
I wish you a grand day and a wonderful upcoming weekend.
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Title Post: Family life in the 1950's?
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